DECEPTION – JAMIE LEE


MY OPINION – FACT OR CRAP

We in the Transgendered Community, have come a long way, recently, in Education, Laws, Acceptance,

and freedom, by leaps and bounds!

EVEN WITH THE LABELS AND TERMS USED

A few years ago, naturally born women were called “Genetic Females” and we were referred as Cross-dressers, in the Transgendered Community,   I and some others are called “Transsexuals”

Then an intense study was done by the Medical and Scientific Community, and they found that,

Trans-sexuality is caused by “Genetics” !

Hmmmmm.  Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy !  Now I have the reason I was born this way, an answer if been seeking all my life!

AND IT POINTS OUT,  THAT I AM A FEMALE BORN IN THE WRONG BODY!!!!!!

(INDIVIDUALS IN THIS COMMUNITY CAN PLAY WITH VERBAGE ALL THEY WANT}

BUT THE FACT ARE WE ARE NOT, NATAL WOMEN !!!!!

When the above Study was completed, it then allowed us transsexuals to refer to ourselves as Genetic Woman, Justifiably so!

So this changes the terminology in the following manner:

1. A naturally born woman is now referred to as a “NATAL WOMAN”

2. Transsexual woman are and can be referred to as “GENETIC WOMAN”

BUT, WE ARE NOT NATAL WOMEN, AND TO DECEIVE ANY ONE, IN PUBLIC, ESPECIALLY IN THE TRANSGENDERED COMMUNITY IS WRONG !!!!!!!!!   And especially to rely on the ignorance of the public, where they don’t understand the terms, into thinking we are “NATAL FEMALES”

I EVEN TOOK MY OPINION TO THE NEXT STEP, AND CALLED A FEW OF MY LONG TERM FRIENDS IN OUR COMMUNITY AND ASKED THEIR OPINION!

HERE IS WHAT THEY SAID:

1. They agreed with what I said above.

2.  They said it was ok to identify ourselves in public, as being born female and on the internet, etc, which I agree with.

3.  We all agreed. that we can refer to us as females, but the moment it becomes a friendship with anyone, we need to be honest and truthful, and not deceive them into thinking we are “NATALLY BORN WOMAN”

AND I SAY, EXPECIALLY WHEN A PERSON IS TRANSGENDERED, AND PLAYS WITH WORDS, TO DECEIVE US, AS SISTERS IN THE COMMUNITY, ABOUT THEIR TRANSITION!

IT IS IGNORANT AND DISRESPECTFULL TO US AND TO NATAL WOMAN!

Jamie Lee – Genetic Transsexual Woman

GLBT ADOVOCATE

NOTICE:

I AND MY CRYSTAL CONNECTION IS ABOUT EDUCATION AND SUPPORT!  I AM GOING TO BE BOLD ENOUGH TO SAY , I KNOW EVERYTHING THERE IS ABOUT THE TRANSGENDERED COMMUNITY.

I APPOLOGIZE FOR MY BRASHNESS SOMETIMES, BUT I THINK THAT COMES FROM,  BEING EX-LAW ENFORCEMENT FOR 30 YEARS.  IF ANYONE DISAGREES WITH ANY STORY, STATEMENT, OR OPINION SEEN ON THE “CRYSTAL CONNECTION”   I INVITE YOU TO CORRECT ME, OR SAY WHERE I AM WRONG

Thank you – Jamie Lee

OH, by the way, I want to warn you!

Don’t ever get into a pissing contest with a skunk!  You will always lose!

and

Never try to “BULLSHIT a “BULLSHITTER”

JAMIE LEE’S U.S. ARMY TRAINING CAMP…………………………..


CRYSTAL CONNECTION TRAINING CAMP

“BE ALL THAT YOU CAN BE”

IN JAMIE LEE’S ARMY

JAMIE LEE’S CRYSTAL CONNECTION – STATEMENT TO THE WORLD


THE CRYSTAL CONNECTION

One thing that I promise to you, is that,  you will never know what you will see on my site !

The “Crystal Connection” was designed for Education and Excellence

I AND MY CRYSTAL CONNECTION AM PROUD TO PRESENT THE FOLLOWING “GREATEST SPEECH EVER SPOKEN”

ENOUGH IS TRULY ENOUGH !

Through Childhoods hour, I have not been as others were, I have not seen as others saw, I could not bring my passion’s from a common spring !

JAMIE LEE

TURN UP THE SOUND, MAKE THE SCREEN LARGE – AND HAVE THE COURAGE TO LISTEN………………………………………………….

THE CRYSTAL CONNECTION WELCOMES – 4,000 – FOUR THOUSAND VISITORS – FROM 59 – DIFFERENT COUNTRIES !


I am proud to announce that the Crystal Connection, has reached 4,000 visitors, from 51 Countries around the World.

I have published 177, posts, pertaining to GLBT Education and Acceptance.  My Crystal Connection stands for Freedom,  Acceptance of all people, races and religions.  I have worked in Law Enforcement to always protect the rights of others, the rights of others that were not afforded to me in my own transition.

I an my Crystal Connection, does not accept or promote the statement that ” Our Sexuality has to be without fault ! And that must function in strict conformity with all customs & laws !  No matter how illogical they are. and how much hypocrisy they may give rise”!

Jamie-Blk-Mural-S

I PROMOTE ACCEPTANCE AND FREEDOM FOR ALL PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD!

I PROMOTE ENDING DISCRIMINATION, BULLYING, INTOLLERANCE. SEXISM, RACISM !

I BELIEVE IN RELIGIOUS FREEDOMS.

I PROMOTE EGALITARIAN PEOPLE, WHO HAVE EGALTARIAN, IDEAS ABOUT GENDER !

I WILL CONTINUE TO EDUCATE AND ADVOCATE, FOR THE GLBT COMMUNITY AND OUR FREEDOMS.  I WILL CONTINUE TO EDUCATE ABOUT THE INTERSEXED COMMUNITY.

CRYSTAL CONNECTION NON-DISCRIMINATION POLICY – 2-26-2013

I AM MY CRYSTAL CONNECTION – PROHIBIT DISCRIMINATION AGAINST, AND HARRASSMENT,

OF ANYONE BECAUSE OF RACE, COLOR, NATIONAL OR ETHNIC ORIGIN,

AGE, RELIGION, SEX, SEXUAL ORIENTATION,

GENDER IDENTITY & EXPRESSION !

There will be zero tolerance for sites that show or promote, hidden agendas, moralistic behavior, BDSM, pornography, lewd or lascivious behaviur, she-male, sissyfication,  clown porn or any disrespectful photos. 

ADVOCATCY  & EDUCATION

I have be an Advocate in the Transgendered Community for approximately 15 years, during my transition.  I attended Renaissance Transgendered support groups and even taught at them.  I have attended numerous Transgendered Conferences in the Eastern Region of Pa.  I have previously ran a Transgendered support group in the Past.  I have experience in psychology, criminal justice, Domestic Violence, Child abuse, Rape, Stalking,  and much, much more.

Business cards

RESPONSIBILITIES OF A TEACHER AND ADVOCATE IN THE GLBT-INTERSEX COMMUNITY

AS AN ADVOCATE YOU MUST BE AWARE OF WHO YOU ARE TALKING TOO.  IS IT A WIFE, SIGNIFICANT OTHER, SON, DAUGHTER, OR FRIEND OF THE TRANSGENDERED INDIVIDUAL.  YOU MUST BE SENSITIVE OF THE AGE, AND GENDER.  SUICIDE IS HIGH IN OUR COMMUNITY, SO YOU MUST INSURE THAT YOU PROVIDE ACCURATE FACTS, AVIOD OPINIONS.  WE MUST REALIZE AT ALL TIMES, WE DON’T KNOW WHO IS READING OUR STORIES.

WE MUST INSURE THAT WE PROVIDE NOTHING BUT FACTS AND REALISTIC STORIES ALONG WITH EDUCATION.

MY QUALIFICATIONS

COLLEGE VILLANOVA AND PENN STATE, CRIMINAL JUSTICE, PSYCHOLOGY, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, OCCULT, RAPE, CHILD MOLESTATION, MEGAN’S LAW, OUT LAW MOTORCYCLE CLUBS, INVESTIGTIONS, SEARCH AND SEIZURE, CURTURAL AWARENESS, RACEST GROUPS, FEMALE OFFENDERS IN TREATMENT, MH/MR ISSUES, GLBT SUPPORT AND ADVOCACY, CLOSE QUARTERS COMBAT, PRESSURE POINT CONTROL, AND MUCH,  MUCH MORE.   I TAUGHT COLLEGE CLASSES, I AM A CERTIFIED TRAINER IN ANTI TERRIORISM.  I WAS A PRIVATE DETECTIVE, ALONG WITH 30 YRS LAW ENFORCEMENT. 

THE FIRST CHAPTER OF MY UPCOMMING BOOK WAS COMPLETED BY: WRITER, PLAYWRITE, AND AUTHOR. LISA BUFFINGTON !

SHE AND I ARE TEAMING UP FOR A PROJECT IN PUBLIC SPEAKING, WHICH WILL COVER MANY TOPICS, INCLUDING GLBT, INTOLLERANCE, DISCRIMINATION AND ALOT MORE !

I HAVE BEEN RECENTLY RECRUTED BY A MODELING AGENCY, AS A MODEL, ACTOR,  AND VOICE OVER.  I HAVE ATTENDED THE PA. MODEL & TALENT EXPO, ON CAMERA WORKSHOPS, ETC.

FINALLY I MAKE THIS OFFER.  IF ANYONE THAT VISITS MY CRYSTAL CONNECTION,  HAS ANYONE, HUSBAND, WIFE, CHILD, SIGNIFICANT OTHER, WHO NEEDS HELP, REFERENCES, SUPPORT, OR ADVICE.

PLEASE CONTACT ME

Jamie Lee – Crystal Connection

FIFTY NINE COUNTRIES

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BOY SCOUTS OF AMERICA – By: Jamie Lee


The Boy Scouts!  I was a Boy Scout when I was young! My father was a Boy Scout and became a Scout Leader!

I went through the ranks and achieved “ORDER OF THE ARROW”  When I got out of the Military, I was a Scout Leader for many years.  Even working for the higher levels of the Scouting movement.

HMMMM!  I WONDER WHAT THEY WOULD THINK IF THEY SAW ME TODAY !!!!!  AS A TRANSSEXUAL WOMAN!

SCOUT OATH OR PROMISE

On my honor I will do my best

To do my duty to God and my country

and to obey the Scout Law;

To help other people at all times;

To keep myself physically strong,

mentally awake, and morally straight.

Hmmmm!   I wonder how many typical people in our Society practice this!

A SCOUT IS !

Trust worthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean (in thought, body, and stands for clean speech, clean sport, clean habits, and travels with a clean crowd), and reverent!

HERE IS MY QUESTION TO ANYONE WHO READS THIS !

Do you live up to these standards?

IF YOU DO, I SURE AS HELL WANT TO MEET YOU !!!!

BECAUSE BOY SCOUTS IS NOT ABOUT SEXUAL ORIENTATION, OR SEXUAL PREFERENCES.

IT IS ABOUT BEING A DECENT,  CLEAN, AND A EXCEPTIONAL HUMAN BEING, FOR WHO YOU ARE !!!

GAY, LESBIAN, TRANSGENDERED, MAN WOMAN OR CHILD!

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

JAMIE LEE

GAZEBO – LIFE – DEATH – MY FREEDOM – MY RELATIVES


A SECRET

A SECRET!  WHEN ONE PERSON KNOWS , IT STILL MAY BE A SECRET!

WHEN TWO PEOPLE KNOW, THE WORLD KNOWS!

IN LIFE COMES DEATH – IN DEATH COMES LIFE – FREEDOM & ACCEPTANCE

DON’T LET BE DIE-WITHOUT LETTING ME LIVE

JAMIE LEE

Photography by: Carolyn Cate

Photography by: Carolyn Cate

Pintrest your journey

THE LAST WEEK HAS BEEN VERY TRYING, AND INTENSE FOR ME.    LISA BUFFINGTON – A POET, PLAYWRITE, WRITER, AND A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE,  HAS COMPLETED THE FIRST CHAPTER OF MY BOOK,  SHE IS WRITING ABOUT MY LIFE!

THE MODELING AGENCY, WHO RECRUTED ME, IS NOW SETTING IT UP,  FOR ME, TO GO BEFORE, A CASTING DIRECTOR, IN MODELING AND ACTING.

LISA BUFFINGTON,  AND I,  ARE MAKING ARRANGEMENTS,  TO DO PUBLIC SPEAKING, IN SCHOOLS, COLLEGES, AND PRIVATE COMPANIES.

AND THEN, OUT OF NOWHERE, I HEARD,  ABOUT THE DEATH OF A VERY CLOSE UNCLE, OF MINE!   AND,  I WENT TO HIS FUNERAL WITH,  MY WIFE,  ON SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 2ND 2013,  AND THEN,  AFTERWARDS , A FUNCTION  WAS HELD , AT A LOCAL FIRE COMPANY.

HE HAPPENED TO BE ONE OF THE CLOSEST TO ME,  DURING MY LIFE. HE AND I HAD A BOND,  THAT CAN’T BE EXPLAINED IN COMMON WORDS.  I RESPECTED HIM AND HE RESPECTED ME.   I LOVED HIM AND HE LOVED ME.

My mother, had 4 other Sisters, and five brothers, so I was fortunate, to have many relatives, WHO were VERY close, and all loved each other!  And,  that did not include all my Cousins,  and then their children , everyone had integrity, and cared about each other.   And through out the years our bonds  were very,  very close!

SO HERE I WAS,  DRESSED IN DRAG AS A GUY.  MANY RELATIVES WERE THERE.  IT ALMOST FELT LIKE A FAMILY REUNION.

AS I WAS SITTING THERE, I FELT MANY SUTLE EYES, GLANCING TOWARDS ME.    AND WHEN I WALKED UP TO THE BAR FOR A DRINK, ONE OF MY COUSINS SAID TO ME:  “SO IS IT TRUE, WHAT I AM HEARING ABOUT YOU?”   I REPLIED “YES” 

WE HAD A WONDERFULL CONVERSATION.  IN FACT IT WAS MORE THAN WONDERFUL, IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL CONVERSATION!

SO NEEDLESS TO SAY,  WORD SPREAD LIKE WILDFIRE, AND,  I HAD MORE OF MY RELATIVES COMMING TO ME, AND ASKING.  SO I TOLD THEM!

THIS MORNING WHEN I LOOKED AT MY E-MAIL, THERE I SAW ONE FROM MY COUSIN, AND IT READS AS FOLLOWS:

Names have been changed to protect the innocent !!!

Hi Jamie,

Wow!  It’s been a long time and a lot has changed.  I am sure you know which cousin I am because I don’t think there is another Cindy but just in case, Kate and Sam’s Cindy

Over the past few years I have heard about what you are going through and today was able to find your website/blog.  I will not begin to say I understand what you are going through, however, I learned a lot from visiting your website.

I do not pass judgment and truly wish you well.  After reading your journey etc., my heart was broken and I was left feeling very sad.  It is a difficult situation to be in, especially after living a tortured life with such a big secret.  I can’t even imagine what you went through (especially as a child) all of those years, but I give you a lot of credit for being a great person and living a good life.  Most of all, I have the utmost respect for you “coming out.”  That’s really the only way to freedom.  Hopefully, one day you will be accepted for who you are today and live the life you have only dreamed about.

For the most part I am a very busy person.   I work a 40 hour job and more at times, am raising my almost 11 year old grandson (we adopted), who suffers from PTSD and a magnitude of other problems and just don’t have a lot of free time.  With that said, I would love to chat with you via email.  I don’t do Facebook etc.  Too busy.  I would like to offer my support and lend an ear when you need one.

You were always my favorite guy cousin and I will miss Jim, but am certain I would like Jamie just as much and who knows, maybe even more. Jaime, you deserve to be happy.  Hang in there, stay strong and write back!   Take care of yourself.  Got to get the kid to bed………………..

Sending My Love,

Cindy

AND TO HER I SAY!!!!    OMG,  THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR YOUR KIND AND LOVING E-MAIL!   YOU DON’T HAVE ANY IDEA, HOW YOUR WORDS MADE ME FEEL.   I REALLY DIDN’T FEEL YOU WOULD HAVE SAID ANYTHING DIFFERENT!   THANK YOU AGAIN,  SO VERY MUCH…………………………………………………J

SO IT IS TIME FOR ME TO MAKE A STATMENT TO MY RELATIVES

AS YOU VISIT MY BLOG AND GET TO KNOW ME REMEMBER I AM THE SAME PERSON

I AM THE SAME PERSON WHOM YOU’VE KNOWN AND LOVED,  AS I LOVED YOU!

JUST IN DIFFERENT CLOTHS

SOME OF YOU MAY LAUGH, SOME OF YOU MAY GIGGLE

SOME OF YOU WILL MAKE CHARACHTER JUDGEMENTS

SOME OF YOU MAY HAVE QUESTIONS, WHICH I PROUDLY WILL ANSWER

AND I TRULY FEEL THAT,  ALL OF YOU WILL EMBRACE, LOVE AND ACCEPT ME,  FOR WHO I HAVE BEEN SINCE BIRTH

AND LASTELY REMEMBER THIS!

I FEEL BLESSED IN MY LIFE TO HAVE RELATIVES LIKE YOU!

I LOVE YOU ALL

JAMIE LEE

A/K/A

JIM

LASTLY ALL OF YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING I MADE UP

IT WAS CAUSED BY GENETICS

THE MOMENT I STEPPED INTO THE GAZEBO, IN THE PHOTO ABOVE, I SCREAMED TO THE WORLD THAT I WAS FREE

FOR INFINITY

CURTSEY

POST # 2 – A STORY ABOUT MY PRESENT LIFE & MY EXPECTATIONS ! MY CHILDREN !!!


Jamie-standing

THERE IS NO RULES FOR US AS TRANSSEXUALS!    I FEEL THAT THERE ARE SOCIATAL RULES FOR A HETROSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP,  AS WELL AS WELL AS THE CONDUCT OF THE GAY AND LESBIAN LIFESTYLE! 

   WHEN I WAS BORN,  THERE WAS NO INSTRUCTIONS,  THAT CAME WITH THE PACKAGE.  THERE WERE NO RULES,  AS WELL AS A “BOOK OF “HOYLE” , THAT CAME ALONG WITH THE PARAMATERS OF THE GAME.

      A book of Hoyle   Contains all the Games Played in the United States, with Rules, Descriptions, and Technicalities Adapted to the American Methods of Playing!

Don’t get me wrong.  I am not saying, that in life there is structured rules for the behaviorisms of the Heterosexual Relationships , however there are certain paths that are obvious!

Meet, date, marry, have children, walk hand in hand, arms around each other, have children, go dancing, be a  women attend to their hair,  and beauty, along with the rest.  Men watch sports, go hunting, fishing, work, be a law abiding citizen. look at photos of their marriage or life, reminisce, raise their children, grow old together, and then die!

You get the point!

Now to Cross dressers & Transsexuals

Again, understand the difference between the two:  Cross dressers have feminine feelings, like to dress on occasion as woman, can take the cloths off, and life goes on!  Typically these individuals are in healthy, Heterosexual Relationships.

Transsexuals on the other hand, were dealt the fate, to be born in the wrong body, have a core value of femininity, which is a life long struggle do deal with, and to come to terms with,  in their own self-acceptance.  Our brains are that of a natal woman, but our bodies don’t match.  The cause of this, to-date is from GENETICS

Now, what are the rules for us?  There are none!  We were born with no instructions, directions or rules, we have to fly by the seat of our pants, and usually on one engine

There is no one that can teach us, so we seek the comfort of  others in the same dilemma, for those answers!

Now I will say some things before I get back to the topic of my children!   As a male,  I have done all the things I stated above, in the heterosexual rules.

Don’t get me wrong,  I would not replace a thing, that I experienced.   As a male, I met my wife, (which by the way will be the topic of, my next progressive post ) Message to my children:  I loved her, I wanted to get married, I wanted Children! Especially YOU!

I am getting emotional – so I need this song to bring me back!

A song that I have listened too so many times

BECAUSE IT IS HOW I FEEL

BACK TO REALITY !!!!!  And my story, and my feelings, hopes dreams and aspirations…………………………….

TO MAKE A POINT!  I COVERED ABOVE THE EXPECTED BEHAVIOURISMS, OF A HETROSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP!

When I was delivered, the Doctor slapped ME, when in fact,  he should have slapped,  the shit out of my Mother for giving birth to me!

I didn’t know what my fate was as a baby.  It wasn’t until the age of 5-7 years old,  that I realized, I was different! And initially I didn’t know what extreme trauma would accompany that!  Could I exist? NO!  So I had to learn at that young age to HIDE!  So I hid!  And I grew up into adolescence and hid.  I grew as a teenager and I hid.  I went into the Military and hid.  I went into Law Enforcement and I continued to hide, even into the beginning of my marriage.  I was highly trained in the Art of hiding!  For fear of  being hurt!  I was a highly trained “NINJA” in the Art of hiding, and deception, and lack of courage, to deal with the dynamics of who I was, and born to be by the grace of GOD!  I couldn’t dance as Jamie, I couldn’t live as Jamie, I couldn’t sing as Jamie, watch sports, TV, hold hands, and experience life as Jamie!      Jamie had to hide !  What she did best !

IT IS NOW, THAT I WANT TO INTERJECT SOMETHING, WHICH I PRAY TO GOD WILL INSTILL A REALIZATION INTO MY WIFE, CHILDREN, LOVED ONE’S AND FRIENDS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  AND TO THE MAJORITY OF SOCIETY,  WHO DENIES ME !!

I WANT YOU !  TO STUDY THIS PHOTO BELOW!

I WANT YOU TO SHOW THE RESPECT AND,  STUDY IT CLOSELY !!

Photography by: Carolyn Cate

Photography by: Carolyn Cate

Incarceration is compared,  to the years of being incarcerated.   A person who has received a life sentence, and spent say approximately 30 years in prison, can become dependent and institutionalized.   If they are fortunate enough to be Pardoned, and step out into Society, it can be surreal and even traumatizing. 

I COMPARE MY OWN LIFE, AS BEING INCARCERATED

for so many reasons

What this photo above means to me and about me, is the surreal feelings, the feeling of being released from incarceration, of who I was inside and meant to be. 

When I saw this Gazebo in the middle of the Park

I didn’t have fore thought about,  what I was about to do

It was like I was driven by some unknown force, whether, it be a God or a Goddess, or just a divine intervention

I just walked to the middle of it, threw up my arms, and screamed at the top of my voice!

I AM JAMIE LEE AND I AM FREE !!!!!!!!!

I wasn’t thinking about loved ones,  friends,  foes or anything else.   I was thinking about ME!  JUST ME!

It was almost was like, I felt at birth – I was reborn – I felt like a woman,  in it’s divine totality, I felt the beauty of the Estrogen,  flowing in my body, Soul and Spirit-I finally felt freedom, and completeness,  even if it was,  for a short period of time.  It was euphoric!

In hind-sight, I wish I knew, what the other people in, voice range, in the Park,  thought, when the heard me yell that!

I have been living with a pink elephant, in the living room,  for far too long.  My family, at times supportive, and at other times wanting me to just keep things status quo, and, to avoid the conflict of my transition.  My transition is not a choice, it’s a fact,  and even during times when we don’t talk about it,  which is unfortunately more often than not, the issue is there, always like that big pink elephant that we all know is there,  but refuse to acknowledge.  I have a son in law that doesn’t even know I am transgendered.  My daughter has told me over and over again that she supports me and loves me no matter what,  but then on the other hand,  says that we can’t tell her husband or his family because they “won’t understand”.  My daughter seems to feel that it is better to protect her husband,  and in-laws from my reality,  but is it really?

Eventually the truth will come out, it has to,  and when it does,  I am afraid they will feel betrayed,  when they find out that she knew all along,  and hid it from them.  She says she supports and accepts,  me but lies to her husband, her partner in life about her own parent?  I wish she could understand that,  not only does this forced double life hurt me, it is very likely to hurt her marriage,  because of her lies.

My son’s wife and I were really close at one time, having long conversations about being transgendered,  and also about my transitioning.  She seemed very interested and understanding.  I thought we had a very close relationship,  until I found out that at a party,  she was telling other people including my wife,  that I was talking about my blog,  and about what I blog about,  which is transgendered issues.  This caused a huge conflict within the family and left me feeling very betrayed.  How can she tell me over and over that she understands,  and that she supports me,  and then go behind my back like that?

Which is true?  Did she mean it when she said she understood and accepted me?,  or does she really think I am wrong?  It has hurt my trust in her.  This has also perpetuated some problems between my son and I .  He asked me if I wanted to go shopping the day after Thanksgiving and as soon as I said ‘sure, just let me get changed” he said that if I was going to go “dressed” as Jamie then he didn’t want to go.  How disappointed I was, that he was embarrassed or ashamed to be seen with me.  I wish I could make him understand that Jamie, is me,   I don’t “dress as” Jamie.  In the future to their homes, but I do plan,  to just get in the car and stop asking for permission to be who I am.  Why should I have to ask permission for what to wear from anyone much less my son.

There was an insinuation,  that they accepted me, however, didn’t want me around for fear of what, their son, will have to deal with in school, etc.

My Grandson is a little over 2 years old !

SO YOU BE THE JUDGE, IS THIS FACT? OR CRAP?

I know!

FRIVOLOUS

A word characterized by lack of seriousness , sense or purpose, not worthy any more,  of serious notice!

To me, this is a moment of solemn realization, that comes crashing

in on you out of no where!

When I just typed this, for the first time, I thought about that Horse.  The one that is attached to a Carriage, and has that CARROT. dangling in front of him, and keeps, walking, running, and pushing forward, to get it.  I wonder if that horse, ever realizes that he can’t get it?  And stops going after it,  as it still dangles in front of him, knowing that,  he still loves  this  carrot, however was unreachable!

In my life at present, as pertains to my hopes, dreams aspirations, which is my carrot !

You see, it wasn’t until a few days ago, that I had to deal,  with the word frivolous.

In my life, the most important things, like love, relationships, children, friends, goals, acceptances of my self and others and especially MY FEELINGS ABOUT INFINITY – seem to be frivolous, it deeply hurts me.

DOES IT MEAN, THAT AT THIS MOMENT, I WILL GIVE UP – NO –  BUT SINCE, THE REALIZATION HITS YOU. THROUGH THE ACTIONS OR WORDS OF ALL THE PEOPLE OR THINGS MENTIONED – THEY,  ARE GUILTY OF CREATING THIS FEELING WITHIN ME,  TOWARDS, THINGS OR ACTIONS,  BEING FRIVOLOUS, AND CAN’T BLAME ME,  FOR ANY OF MY ACTIONS!

DO I TRULY KNOW AT THIS MOMENT,  HOW MY CHILDREN ACCEPT AND FEEL ABOUT ME, BEING TRANSSEXUAL?

NO! NOT IN IT’S TOTALITY,  BECAUSE THEY WILL NOT CONVERSE WITH ME ABOUT IT !  HOW SAD !

WILL THEY BE ANGRY, WHEN THEY SEE WHAT I HAVE WRITTEN ABOUT THEM

 ABOVE?

MOST LIKELY

BUT ONE THING I KNOW !!!  I MUST PLAY THE CARDS AS THEY FALL

I AM

JAMIE LEE

A TRANSSEXUAL – GENETIC WOMAN

AND FOR ALL TO KNOW – I AM NOT GIVING UP YET, ON ANYTHING

thank you for reading my story

A STORY ABOUT MY PRESENT LIFE & MY EXPECTATIONS ! MY CHILDREN !!! POST #1


 This post was inspired by my own thoughts and feelings!

Which, inspired me, to realize,  that it is time, to talk about my children!

MY WIFE, MY FAMILY & LOVED ONES

This is going to be one of the most intense posts I have written so far!

It will be a time line of sort!

Of people, places and things!

Because it is time to talk about things!

I have been holding off doing, because of my own fears!

Society is not first, and foremost in my life anymore!

My family, loved ones, friends are!

BUT! I must feel, that I can write freely, without censorship!  and anyone misinterpreting my words!

If you do, please show me the, respect and courtesy, to ask me what I meant!

 HOW DARE YOU ALLOW ME TO DIE !  WITHOUT ALLOWING ME TO LIVE

A quote from:  Jamie Lee

cropped patio

ME-MY LONELINESS

From Childhood’s hour I have not been as others were – I have not seen as others saw – I could not bring my passions from a common spring!   EDGAR ALLEN POE

    LONELY, AFRAID, ANGRY, CONFUSED, SECLUDED, INCARCERATED, DEPRESSED, TORTURED, TRAUMATIZED, FRUSTRATED,       MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY EXAUSTED, AND INCOMPLETE!

These are all real words to me!  When was the last time that you felt them all at the same time?

SEXUALITY & GENDER:  OUR SEXUALITY HAS TO BE WITHOUT FAULT!  IT MUST FUNCTION IN STRICT CONFORMITY WITH ALL CUSTOMS & LAWS!  NO MATTER HOW ILLOGICAL THEY ARE AND HOW MUCH HYPOCRICY THEY MAY GIVE RISE!

To be honest I am sick and tired, I am exhausted, I am fed up, I am pissed off,  by constantly being pissed on.  I am tired of the “Me Generation”  I am tired of constantly trying to prove myself to everyone, but not to myself.   Knock, Knock, Knocking on Heaven’s Door!  I am tired of hatred, discrimination, racism, hatred of cultures and religion, intolerance and deception!  I am weary of surviving.  It seems we are constantly being controlled by the Educated Derelicts of our World

.My philosophy is:

 ” It’s better to be, tried by 12, than carried by 6″ 

I am dealing with constant P.T.S.D, from my 30 years of Law-enforcement and going through what I did, dealing with the Dredges Of Society!  Standing on the Edge of the Abyss, to PROTECT YOU!   After being spun, folded and mutated, by the very Society that shuns ME!  I PLACED MY LIFE,  IN DANGER, EVERY DAY, FOR THE SAME ASS HOLES, WHO WON’T ACCEPT ME AS, WHO I AM, AND WHO I WAS BORN TO BE  !!!!!!!!

YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF

YOU ARE PATHETIC

AND NOW ABOUT MY CHILDREN

I raised my children with the following expectations and  Philosophy’s :  Stand up for yourselves, and never be taken advantage of.  Be the best you can be and anything!  Failing is OK, get up and go again.  Have a understanding of Morals, especially, your own!  Do not be a Racist, sexist or hypocrite!  Always have an open mind.  Respect people, places and things, as you want to be respected.  Live your life with integrity.  Make your own, children proud to follow in your footsteps.    DO NOT Discriminate!  Never show intolerance.  Always care about the feelings of others.  Respect cultures, religion and humanistic values!  If you don’t understand, educate your self before you make any decision!   For the purpose of this post I am writing about my expectations.  I was gifted and fortunate in life, to have a wife that believed in the same values and expectations.

Most importantly, we taught them about treating people compassionately, with their diversities, whether, it be handicaps, physical abnormalities, or skills, abilities and education !   Respect other peoples opinions and views……..!

And to be honest!  I am pretty damn proud of them!  Where they have gone, with their Careers, relationships, and goals!   I couldn’t ask for anything more, at least at the time, I felt that way.

YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THAT THE INTENSITY, PAIN AND SUFFERING, ALONG WITH ACCEPTANCE, UNDERSTANDING AND TREATEMENT OF US AS TRANSSEXUALS, IS GENERATIONAL.  WE AS OLDER TRANSEXXUALS, HAVE HAD TO GO THROUGH,  MORE STRUGGLES TO TRANSITION, THEN THE YOUNGER, TRANSGENDERED COMMUNITY…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….!

They can transition into their lives!  We have lived our lives, under constant fear, that we would lose the most precious things to us, our parents, our brothers & sisters, our Wives, our relationships, our significant others, our loved ones, our friends, and our children.  You see, we must transition into a life that we have already built, through our own trials and tribulations, fears and expectations.  And our own self-Acceptance.   It is not easy, in fact it is a nightmare, which no typical human being could fathom, or understand.

Now, back to the topic of my children!   Since the moment and time that I told my children that I was a transsexual, does anyone think that I was stupid enough not to understand the dynamics, that came along with that!  First was their reaction, and acceptance of me.  When I told each one of my two children the were in their late 20’s, my son and my daughter.  They both embraced me at that moment, and said it was OK.  It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life.

BUT, did they think for a moment, that I wasn’t aware, and conscious, concerning their ability’s and capabilities to understand?  Of course I was, I had to live through all the dilemma of exposing myself to them.  I knew, if I did, when they were children, that I could have changed their lives in so many ways.  Tragic in many ways.   Do they think I didn’t understand, especially back then, how they would have been ridiculed, laughed at, embarrassed, and humiliated by their friends and peers, knowing that their father was a Transsexual?   I did! Ever so intensely and painfully.  I did what any parent would do!  Protect them!  Maybe I was wrong, maybe I was right, but it was a choice.   Plus, how could I expect them, or anyone else to understand,  this shit back then, when I didn’t understand myself.   My God what a dilemma!  I felt like a mentally ill,  freak of nature.   Since childhood!

NOW MY CHILDREN ARE IN THEIR 30’s, MARRIED WITH CHILDREN. DECENT HUSBANDS AND WIFES, JOBS THAT HAVE PROFESSIONALISM AND INTEGRITY.   THEY ARE LEARNING ABOUT THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF LIFE, AND THE COLERATAL DAMAGE, OF  SICK AND UNMORALISTIC SOCIETY, WHICH IS ALL WE HERE ABOUT , DISCRIMINATION, INTOLERANCE,  AND DEATH OF INNOCENT CHILDREN ND ADULTS.   THE FILTH AND THE DEGRIDATION,  OF THE DREDGES OF SOCIETY, WHICH IS ON TV, AND PROMOTED FOR THE ENJOYMENT, OF SOME SORT OF PATHETIC AUDIENCE!   RE: THE JERRY SPRINGER SHOW, THE USE OF INNOCENT CHILDREN , AND ALL THE REST,  TO GAIN RATINGS, FOR MONETARY GAIN! AND ARE CAPABLE OF UTILIZING INNOCENT CHILDREN!

We all are reaching our toleration, of greedy and filthy Politicians, who only have their own hidden Agendas.  We are in a war, with people and Cultures we don’t understand.  We tend to feel that WE as Americans, are the only, life forms that deserve to exist.  Economy sucks, gas prices suck, The bullshit that is fed to us by our own Government sucks. Gun control sucks, because there IS an easy answer, DO BACKGROUND CHECKS!  When a Convicted Felon, Is found in possession, incarcerate him for 50 years.  Or better yet, pry the gun from “HIS Cold Dead Hands”  Don’t penalize the respectful, law abiding Citizens!   Give more power to deal with Metal health, Disorders who are capable of hurting their selves, or especially others!!

Criminals have rights! VICTIMS HAVE NONE!  Holy shit!  Something is wrong with us!

GO, figure that all the Pharmaceutical Company’s have jumped aboard the band wagon to make money at the demise of people.  There is a pill now available that cures any ailment, and at the same time can destroy, your liver, kidney’s, make you nauseous, dizzy, suicidal, and potentially a basket comatose case!

I love the one about Cialis, and Viagra!   Guys, this IS you love potion of today.  You no longer have to use you brain to get turned on,  by a beautiful woman!  You can just pop this magical, pill.  That will put a mile on her face!  Jesus Christ, you even have the propensity to have a, 4 hour erection! 

I would have been happy in my life, to have one last for more that 15 minutes. Damn,  4 hours, I would have been floating down a river, with a smile on my face, yelling “OPEN THE DRAW BRIDGE”!                    This may be funny, but it is grossly pathetic……………..!

SO BACK TO MY CHILDREN!  I THINK I HAVE GOTTEN THE POINT, ACROSS,  OF WHAT,  I WAS SAYING ABOVE !  AT LEAST I HOPE!

What should I expect of my Children, in my life right now?   And,  should I expect anything?

WHAT SHOULD I EXPECT,  FROM MY CHILDREN ?      I AT LEAST EXPECT THE FOLLOWING:  

1.    Respect

2.   I expect that they, at least research on occasion,  and learn about the dynamics of the Transgendered Community.

3.    I expect that they begin to understand,  what I have given up in my life, to give them ONE!

4.    I expect that they, don’t ignore me and have a conversation once and awhile !

5.    I expect that they at least try to begin to understand who I am, and the genetics, surrounding it.

6.    I expect that they show courage.

7.    I expect they don’t shun me……….

8.   I expect that they don’t, demand a pity party!

(Along the way,  I may edit this list on occasion, and add things}

I know that they are afraid of acknowledging me, because they are embarrassed and afraid of, what their, peers, co-workers, and others,  will say to them!  And I don’t expect them to allow me to rain on their Parade, either.  But at least, love and respect me, for having the courage to do what I am doing.

I WILL NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THAT TELLING THEM ABOUT ME BEING TRANSSEXUAL,  IS TOO STRESS FULL, FOR THEM!   THEY ARE IN THEIR 30’S, THIS SURE ISN’T THE FIRST TIME, THEY HEARD ABOUT THE GAY, LESBIAN AND TRANSGENDERED PEOPLE……….HOWEVER, THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IT CAME CLOSE TO HOME !   AND BY THE WAY, IF IT IS TOTALLY TRUE THAT TRANSSEXUALITY,  IS DUE TO GENETICS, THEN THEY HAD BETTER, COME TO TERMS WITH IT,  FOR THEIR OWN CONCERNS,  AS WELL AS THEIR CHILDREN’S !!

JAMIE LEE

Blaxk Rose

Given a choice, I will always choose the red pill…Jesse – Female to Male


http://claudiason.wordpress.com/

 

 

I’m Never Gonna Wear A Dress Again

 

JAMIE LEE’S CRYSTAL CONNECTION NEWS DESK – TSA – TRANSPORTATION SECURITY ADMIN.


I EVEN GOT DRESSED UP TO PRESENT THIS POST TO YOU.  IN MY OPINION, FOR  LOT OF REASONS, THIS IS A HUDGE MOVE FORWARD, BY OUR GOVERMENT, IN REFERENCE TO THE TRANSGENDERED COMMUNITY…….I DO BELIEVE THAT TSA OFFICERS SHOULD BE INTENSLY TRAINED NOW, IN THE DYNAMICS, OF THE TRANSGENDERED COMMUNITY, SO THEY,  MAY DEAL WITH US IN A RESPECTFUL, DIGNIFIED MANNER !!!!  GIVE THEM A CHANCE !!!!

JAMIE LEE A TRANSEXUAL GENETIC WOMAN 

Jamie-standing

SO YOU THINK,  WE ARE NOT MAKING HEAD WAY IN THE TRANSGENDERED COMMUNITY.  JUST READ THIS, PUBLISHED BY THE NATIONAL CENTER FOR TRANSGENDER EQUALITY.   I AM PROUD TO ANNOUNCE THIS!  DO I BELIEVE, THAT TRANSGENDERED INDIVLDUALS WILL BE ABLE TO TRAVEL WITHOUT DEMEANING GIGGLES, AND DISRESPECT?  HELL NO! NOT IMMEDIATELY!   INTOLERANCE IS INTOLERANCE !!! 

BUT REMEMBER THIS, THE MAJORITY OF TSA OFFICERS ARE HARD WORKING INDIVIDUALS, WHO BELIEVE IN THEIR JOBS AND THEIT RESPONSIBILITIES – THAT IS PROTECTING YOU AND THE TRAVELING PUBLIC, FROM HARM!

BUT THIS!  IS A MAJOR MOVE FOWARD, IN OUR ATTEMPTS TO BE FREE………….AND KNOWN.  AND UNDERSTOOD- JAMIE LEE

Advancing Transgender Equality.  The Blog of the National Center for Transgender Equality

National Institutes of Health Issues Progress Report on LGBT Health Research

TSA recognizes the concerns members of the transgender community may have with undergoing the security screening process at our Nation’s airports and is committed to conducting screening in a dignified and respectful manner. These travel tips will explain the various screening processes and technologies travelers may encounter at security checkpoints.

Preparing for Travel

Making Reservations: Secure Flight requires airlines to collect a traveler’s full name, date of birth, gender and Redress Number (if applicable) to significantly decrease the likelihood of watch list misidentification. Travelers are encouraged to use the same name, gender, and birth date when making the reservation that match the name, gender, and birth date indicated on the government-issued ID that the traveler intends to use during travel.

Packing a Carry-on: All carry-on baggage must go through the screening process. If a traveler has any medical equipment or prosthetics in a carry-on bag, the items will be allowed through the checkpoint after completing the screening process. Travelers may ask that bags be screened in private if a bag must be opened by an officer to resolve an alarm. Travelers should be aware that prosthetics worn under the clothing that alarm a walk through metal detector or appear as an anomaly during Advanced Imaging Technology (AIT) screening may result in additional screening, to include a thorough pat-down. Travelers may request a private screening at any time during the security screening process.

Contacting TSA in Advance of Travel: Travelers may contact TSA prior to a flight through the TSA Contact Center at 1-866-289-9673 and TSA-ContactCenter@dhs.gov.

The Screening Process

Private Screening: Screening can be conducted in a private screening area with a witness or companion of the traveler’s choosing. A traveler may request private screening or to speak with a supervisor at any time during the screening process.

Travel Document Checker: The traveler will show their government-issued identification and boarding pass to an officer to ensure the identification and boarding pass are authentic and match. Transgender travelers are encouraged to book their reservations such that they match the gender and name data indicated on the government-issued ID.

Walk Through Metal Detector: Metal detectors are in use at all airports.

Advanced Imaging Technology (AIT): Screening with advanced imaging technology is voluntary and travelers may “opt out” at any time. Travelers who “opt out” of the AIT screening are required to undergo a thorough pat-down by an officer of the same gender as the traveler presents.

New Advanced Imaging Technology Software: TSA has upgraded all millimeter wave advanced imaging technology units with new software called Automated Target Recognition to further enhance privacy protections by eliminating the image of an actual traveler and replacing it with a generic outline of a person.

Pat-Down: A pat-down may be performed if there is an alarm of the metal detector, if an anomaly is detected using advanced imaging technology, if an officer determines that the traveler is wearing non-form fitting clothing, or on a random basis. If a pat-down is chosen or otherwise necessary, private screening may be requested. Pat-downs are conducted by an officer of the same gender as presented by the individual at the checkpoint.

Prosthetics: Travelers should neither be asked to nor agree to lift, remove, or raise any article of clothing to reveal a prosthetic and should not be asked to remove it.

Behavior Detection Program: Behavior Detection Officers screen travelers using non-intrusive behavior observation and analysis techniques to identify potentially high-risk passengers. Officers are designed to detect individuals exhibiting behaviors that indicate they may be a threat to aviation and/or transportation security. Individuals exhibiting specific observable behaviors may be referred for additional screening, which can include a pat-down and physical inspection of carry-on baggage.

TSA recognizes that exhibiting some of these behaviors does not automatically mean a person has terrorist or criminal intent. Referrals for additional screening are solely based on specific observed behaviors.

Reporting Travel Issues or Concerns

Travelers who believe they have experienced unprofessional conduct at a security checkpoint are encouraged to request a supervisor at the checkpoint to discuss the matter immediately or to submit a concern to TSA’s Contact Center at: TSA-ContactCenter@dhs.gov.

Travelers who believe they have experienced discriminatory conduct because of a protected basis may file a concern with TSA’s Office of Civil Rights & Liberties, Ombudsman and Traveler Engagement at: Civil Rights for Travelers.

Travelers may also file discrimination concerns with the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) Office for Civil Rights and Civil Liberties at: Civil Rights and Civil Liberties.

The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) recently unveiled a webpage featuring information and advice for transgender travelers going through airport security. TSAs advice, while not comprehensive, covers a few important points:

  • Travelers      should make sure that the gender provided when they book their flight      matches the gender designation on the government-issued ID they bring to      the airport. TSA Travel Document Checkers will check to ensure      that information on your ID matches your boarding pass, however it does      not matter whether your current gender presentation matches the gender      marker on your ID or your presentation in your ID photo, and TSA officers      should not comment on this.
  • In the      event that a pat-down is required, it will only be conducted by an officer      of the same gender as the traveler, based on the traveler’s gender      presentation. This means that transgender women should be searched      by female officers, and transgender men should be searched by male      officers.
  • Transgender      people should never be required to lift, remove or raise an article of      clothing to reveal a prosthetic item and should not be asked to remove it.      This      applies to items such as breast forms and packers.
  • Transgender      people who experience discriminatory or unprofessional conduct should      request a supervisor and report it to TSA and to the DHS Office for Civil      Rights and Civil Liberties.

NCTE Executive Director Mara Keisling says, “We’re thankful that the TSA is offering this kind of advice to trans travelers. It lets us know that trans people are on TSAs radar, and that they’re thinking about how to be helpful. But the TSA can strengthen their advice and do the work needed to address the full range of concerns transgender people face in airport security.”

Results from the National Transgender Discrimination Survey found that nearly a third of transgender people experienced disrespect, discrimination or assault on an airplane or with TSOs. And for seven years, NCTE has advocated that the TSA develop procedures to avoid screening that can out transgender people and invade their privacy, as well as to provide appropriate training for Transportation Security Officers. NCTE has also urged TSA to address numerous reports of discrimination against transgender employees by adopting explicit nondiscrimination policies.

We will soon release updated resources to educate transgender people about what they should expect at airport security, and how to deal with problems at the airport.

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