“BRIAN CATE” THANK YOU ! FOR EVERYTHING ! JAMIE LEE…………..More of my Journey to South Carolina


If you the reader, understands what I have been through in my life and career, you may possibly understand the intensity of what I am about to write.

Here is a Honorable man, who is going through the same intensity and problems in life, we all are persevering due to the Economy, so and so fourth……

Here is a man that taught me the True meaning of  “Shit & Shinola”  in my life. 

BRIAN SAID TO ME THAT, BEFORE I LEAVE AND GO OUT INTO THE WORLD, HE WOULD TEACH ME THIS!  AND NOW I AM READY TO OUT AS JAMIE LEE………..

He is a proud man, who even through his own trial & tribulations, opened the doors to his heart, home and family, to someone he didn’t even know.   ME…………..

His wife was very ill and at times on the cusps of death, and he still did many things for me.  He went out of his way, to have me call in to the Kinetic Radio show,  from home one day.   He then in the midst of his own, stress, and severe family problems, made it possible for me to come there in person and appear on the Kinetic Radio Show!

Basically every morning when he woke up, I was sitting out side on his patio, by myself.   He made Coffee, and invited me to have some. (By the way thank you Brian-You don’t know how bad I needed coffee, each morning)  .

Any way, he and I sat talking about, many aspects of life, which I believe inspired me, as well as I pray that some of my words, inspired him.

I HAVE TO TAKE A MOMENT TO EXPLAIN SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT!

I am a Transsexual woman, who has survived the pain and suffering, trials and tribulations, of my transition.  Who is trying to find the meaning and and courage of self acceptance.  I must be honest that when I was driving to there home, I was scared.  I was scared of the unknown. I apparently was the first Transsexual their family has ever met in person. Actually I was a little terrified, of how they would receive and accept me………When I finally arrived at their home, my “radar” so to say, was operational.  Everyone I met, I searched for signs, of nonacceptance, of signs of feeling I was some kind of oddity!

Another Trans Person can relate to what I am saying.  I was looking for signs of disrespect, laughter, ridicule, during my whole stay with them.  NOT only, did I not experience any of that, what I experienced from this family was the total opposite!

This family treated me as a true woman, in an unfettered manner. They opened their doors and made me feel like I was part of their family.  You must understand that we were total strangers until then.  They made me feel truly like I was “A bag of chips and all that”   I truly in my wildest dreams didn’t know how to take such an open minded and kind family.  Their son was wonderful as well as their daughter.  Even a relative named Sarah was totally acceptable of me. It made me feel like I was thrown into a UTOPIA…………………To this whole family, and their inspiration along with acceptance, I curtsey to you!

Thank you ever so much……….Jamie Lee

CURTSEY

BACK TO BRIAN……..

One day half way through my visit, Brian and I were alone in the kitchen and he very compassionately said these words to me!

Jamie Lee, thank you for being here and inspiring my wife, to survive, to get out of bed, and live, to get back into her art and photography, and to help bring her back to me” 

OH MY GOD!  How does a person respond to a man that says that to you?  It can’t be answered by a mere “your welcome” Brian.  I feel this family learned a multitude of  things from me as well as they intensely inspired my own self-acceptance!

Another gift they gave to me was the day, that they teamed up on me, and said “Jamie” take off you wig!  You are what is underneath it.  Be FREE…………………….!  I DID!

The last thing that I find interesting, is that they all gave me permission, to post their family photos and names on my BLOG!

And show, what their integrity, and hearts, are about as a family,  showing the truest acceptance of diversity, acceptance and the Human Condition…………………….I AM HUMBLE

new Brian & jamie 2

The Cate Family photo

SO BRIAN THANK YOU!  FOR TEACHING ME THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “SHIT AND SHINOLA” !!!!!!

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY!  THANK YOU FOR OPENING YOUR HOME TO ME  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One last thing I would like to add.   I pray that I did not disrespect, your home, family, children in any manner!  And if I did, I am truly sorry!

YOU ARE TRULY AN AMAZING PERSON…………………………………..

Thank you,

Jamie Lee…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

ONE THING I WILL NEVER SEE TOTALLY IN MY LIFE – RAINBOW IN THE DARK – ACCEPTANCE – I AM JAMIE LEE, AND I, AT LEAST ACCEPT MYSELF!


 

Acceptance

 

The term acceptance is defined as a noun, in which it shows to have three different meanings.

The first is known as the act of taking or receiving something offered. For example, if someone is giving you a gift and you receive it, then you have accepted the gift; therefore, having acceptance.

Another definition of acceptance has to deal with positive welcome; favor and endorsement. In which, a person could like someone and, have acceptance for them due to their approval of that person.

The third description of acceptance is that it can be act of believing or assenting.

Acceptance – “An express act or implication by conduct that manifests assent to the terms of an offer in a manner invited or required by the offer so that a binding contract is formed. The exercise of power conferred by an offer by performance of some act. The act of a person to whom something is offered of tendered by another, whereby the offered demonstrates through an act invited by the offer an intention of retaining the subject of the offer.” (Chirelstein, 2001)

This definition overlaps with the definition of the quality known as toleration. Acceptance and tolerance are not synonyms.

E. Tolle (Power of Now, etc.) defines acceptance as a “this is it” response to anything occurring in any moment of life. There, strength, peace and serenity are available when one stops struggling to resist, or hang on tightly to what is so in any given moment. What do I have right now? Now what I am I experiencing? The point is, can one be sad when one is sad, afraid when afraid, silly when silly, happy when happy, judgmental when judgmental, over thinking when over thinking, serene when serene, etc.

 

THE COURAGE TO ACCEPT ACCEPTANCE

There is a basic principle in theology which states that faith or Scripture contains the answer to the deepest questions of the human heart.  Faith is about life, my life.  Faith is like x-raying my human existence.  It helps me to live better, to be more human, to be more integrated.  Faith is to discover that there is only a oneness:  God is the deepest Ground of my being.

There is a basic principle in theology which states that faith or Scripture contains the answer to the deepest questions of the human heart.  Faith is about life, my life.  Faith is like x-raying my human existence.  It helps me to live better, to be more human, to be more integrated.  Faith is to discover that there is only a oneness:  God is the deepest Ground of my being.

The Question

One of the deepest needs of the human heart is the need to be appreciated.  Every human being wants to be valued.  This is not to say that everybody wants to be told by others how wonderful he is.  No doubt there is that desire, too, but that is not fundamental.  We could say that every human being wants to be loved.  But even this admits of ambiguity.  There are as many varieties of love as there are species of flowers.  For some people, love is something passionate; for others, it is something romantic; for others, love is something merely sexual.  There is, however, a deeper love, a love of acceptance.  Every human being craves to be accepted, accepted for what he is.  Nothing in human life has such a lasting and fatal effect as the experience of not being completely accepted.  When I am not accepted, then something in me is broken.  A baby who is not welcome is ruined at the roots of his existence.  A student who does not feel accepted by his teacher will not learn.  A man who does not feel accepted by his colleagues on the job will suffer from ulcers, and be a nuisance at home.  Many of the life histories of prisoners reveal that somewhere along the way they went astray because there was no one who really accepted them.  Likewise, when a religious does not feel accepted by her community, she cannot be happy.  A life without acceptance is a life in which a most basic human need goes unfulfilled.

Acceptance means that the people with whom I live give me a feeling of self-respect, a feeling that I am worthwhile.  They are happy that I am who I am.  Acceptance means that I am welcome to be myself.  Acceptance means that though there is need for growth, I am not forced.  I do not have to be the person I am not!  Neither am I locked in by my past or present.  Rather I am given room to unfold, to outgrow the mistakes of the past.  In a way we can say that acceptance is an unveiling.  Every one of us is born with many potentialities.  But unless they are drawn out by the warm touch of another’s acceptance they will remain dormant.  Acceptance liberates everything that is in me.  Only when I am loved in that deep sense of complete acceptance can I become myself.  The love, the acceptance of other persons, makes me the unique person that I am meant to be.  When a person is appreciated for what he does, he is not unique; someone else can do the same work perhaps even better than he.  But when a person is loved for what he is, then he becomes a unique and irreplaceable personality.  So indeed, I need that acceptance in order to be myself.  When I am not accepted, I am a nobody.  I cannot come to fulfillment.  An accepted person is a happy person because he is opened up, because he can grow.

To accept a person does not mean that I deny his defects that I gloss over them or try to explain them away.  Neither does acceptance mean to say that everything the person does is beautiful and fine.  Just the opposite is true.  When I deny the defects of the person, then I certainly do not accept him.  I have not touched the depth of that person.  Only when I accept a person can I truly face his defects.

To express it in a negative way:  acceptance means that I never give a person the feeling that he doesn’t count.  Not to expect anything from a person is tantamount to killing him, making him sterile.  He cannot do anything.  It is said that children with rickets scratch lime from the walls.  People who are not accepted scratch acceptance from the walls.  And what are the symptoms?

  • Boasting:  in a subtle or obvious way they provide themselves with the praise they want so badly.
  • Rigidity:  a lack of acceptance causes a lack of security on the path of life and, a fortiori, lack of courage to risk one step to either side of the path.
  • Inferiority complex:  this simply defines the above conditions.
  • Masturbation or any other superficial joy:  deep down there is so much lacking that they endeavor to get whatever they can out of life in an easy way.
  • The desire to assert themselves, the frightful power to impose themselves, the excessive need for attention, the tendency to feel threatened, to exaggerate, to gossip, to suspect others:  these are other symptoms of lack of acceptance.

The really balanced person does not have to indulge in these measures.  Erik Erikson in his book, Young Man Luther, writes:
In (his) first relationship man learns something which most individuals who survive and remain sane can take for granted most of the time.  Only psychiatrists, priests and born philosophers know how sorely that something can be missed.  I have called his early treasure “basic trust;” it is the first psychosocial trait and the fundament of all others.  Basic trust in mutuality is that original ‘optimism’ that assumption that ‘somebody is there,’ without which we cannot live.  In situations in which such basic trust cannot develop in early infancy because of a defect in the child or in the maternal environment, children die mentally.  They do not respond or learn; they do not assimilate their food and fail to defend themselves against infection, and often they die physically as well as mentally

Jamie Lee………………………….

 

THIS IS DEDICATED TO ME ……………….I AM A RAINBOW IN THE DARK……JAMIE LEE


When there’s lightning
You know it always brings me down
‘Cause it’s free and I see
that its me who’s lost and never found

A cry out for magic
I feel it dancing in the light
It was cold, lost my hold
To the shadows of the night

No sign of the morning coming
You’ve been left on your own
Like a rainbow in the dark,
A rainbow in the dark

Do your demons-do they ever let you go?
When you try
Do they hide deep inside
Is it someone that you know?

You’re just a picture
You’re an image caught in time
We’re a lie-You and I,
We’re words without a rhyme

There’s no sign of the morning coming
You’ve been left on you’re own
Like a rainbow in the dark
Just a rainbow in the dark, yeah, ya

When I see lightning
You know it always brings me down
‘Cause it’s free and i see
That it’s me who’s lost and never found

Feel the magic-I feel it floating in the air
But it’s fear
And you hear it calling you beware
Look out!

There’s no sign of the morning coming
No sight of the day
You’ve been left on you’re own
Like a rainbow, like a rainbow in the dark yeah ya
You’re a rainbow in the dark
Just a rainbow in the dark
No sign of the morning
You’re a rainbow…in the dark Whoa ooo whoa

JAMIE LEE- I AM A RAINBOW IN THE DARK…………………….

………………………….The Mantras ………………….. JAMIE LEE


ME   !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1. I love the woman/man I’m becoming.
2. I am learning the art of self love.
3. I am a survivor.
4. I am the only thing in my own way.
5. I am proud of the woman/man I am.
6. I believe I can be kinder to myself.
7. I have the power to change my world.
8. I choose to let others opinions of me be their responsibility.
9. I will conduct myself in such a way in which I can be proud.
10. I have much to celebrate.
11. I am actively becoming a better me.
12. I am redefining what it means to trust.
13. I am redefining what is important to me.
14. I choose to stop apologizing for being me.
15. I am committed to celebrating the person that I am.
16. I am committed to loving me.
17. I choose to highly value my thoughts, opinions, and ideas.
18. I choose to consciously surround myself with positive influences.
19. I am capable of making healthy choices.
20. I know how to adequately fuel my body.
21. I will accomplish whatever I choose to accomplish.
22. I choose to believe in me.
23. I commit to listening to my intuition.
24. I know putting myself first is not about being selfish, it’s about self-care.
25. I will be led by my dreams.
26. I will be fueled by passion.
27. I give myself permission to both fail and succeed.
28. I have the ability to choose happiness.
29. I have the ability to see the brighter side.
30. I am a sexual being capable of extreme intimacy.
31. I know I am braver that I can see.
32. My pace is perfect.
33. I am exactly where I need to be.
34. Everything happens for a reason.
35. I am the Divine.
36. I am the only “sign” I need.
37. I deserve greatness.
38. I deserve sublime happiness.
39. I am deserving of abundance.
40. I consciously choose love above all else.
41. I am capable of great kindness.
42. I believe in all of my abilities.
43. Today, I choose me.
44. I am in control of my thoughts.
45. I choose to live in freedom over fear.
46. I am motivated by peace.
47. I recognize that my past does not have to define me.
48. I define myself by my character not my circumstance.
49. I have abundant courage.
50. I have the ability to persevere.
51. I am a bad ass.

MORE OF MY TRIP TO SOUTH CAROLINA……………JAMIE LEE


Here is more photos of my trip to S.C. and the Family I stayed with:

Here is a photo of Brian and me at the Political Summit Meeting…….He and I, solved all the world problems, as well as the Economy……..

Here is where we began to change the World opinion!

We finally toasted, to our  plan to save the World ! 

And all of you may ask, where was our Secret Service, protecting us at this Summit?    Trust me they WERE around!

I WISH TO INTRODUCE ONE OF OUR AGENTS………..LILY !

MO MO a/k/a Molly guarded guarded us through thick and thing, watching our perimeter with great caution……….

ANOTHER SECRET WEAPON WE HAD AVAILABLE WAS  “MO MO ”  She was a statue in the back yard, who could come to life in an instant, to pounce like a leopard, if any danger approached…………….She has even been known to sit upon Roof Tops and keep a look out.   Most of the time you can’t see her.  She appears to be a White Flash going past you.   She is truly our ‘TOP SECRET – STEALTH WEAPON”

Jamie Lee………………………….

WORDS I LOVE YOU! CAN YOU SAY IT IN A PLUTIONC MANNER……………….? Jamie Lee


The question keeps rising, The words I Love you.  Being transsexual or just being!   Can you tell a friend that you love them.

 

My analysis is you can:   Because of the following!

• Because s/he is fun to be around
• Because s/he is great to talk with about what’s on your mind; s/he listens and gives good advice
• Because s/he is warm, friendly, and nice to other people
• Because the two of you have a lot in common
• Because s/he respects your privacy
• Because s/he makes you feel good about yourself
• Because s/he has taken the time to get to know you and involve you in his or her life
• And an infinite number of other reasons

 

Would you tell a platonic guy friend that you love them? In a friend way…(girls)?

Girls always say to one another that they love them, and of course they are friends and they mean it in a friend way. So that being said, would you tell your platonic man-friend that you love them in that friendly way, to show how much you care? Or would that just be weird for you?

Very very tricky! Situation & circumstance matter. In this day & age people read different meanings to everything. For instance if you were at the airport & your wife &/or kids are there to see you off you would comfortably shout out ‘I love you’ to any one or all of them. If several of your friends were in the same situation as your family it would sound ok,  but one male friend seeing you off would be a different story if you shouted out “I Love you”.
I have had this friend for over over 45yrs. He is more than a friend; he is closer to me than some of my brothers. In them days on a lazy afternoon we could be found lying side by side just chatting & really enjoying each others company. Today people would misinterpret the situation & label you wrongly. For me I have no qualms in telling my friend that I love him.

“Platonic Love” is a problematic term.

I do my best, these days, to avoid using it. Let me tell you why.
First of all, the original meaning of “platonic love” comes from Plato’s The Symposium, where the ideal kind of love was described as a kind redirecting the lover’s focus from the beloved (and sex with the beloved) to “the divine” or “philosophy,” basically to an interaction of the mind or some outside pursuit of knowledge. Plato (and Socrates) did not mean to exclude sexuality altogether from this ideal. They condemned the kind of erotic love that keeps two people obsessed with sex and each other’s body, to the point of neglecting those higher ideas, pursuits, etc, but they did not quite say that the ideal love is totally nonsexual.

The contemporary use of the term “platonic love” is obviously an inaccurate one. It is not true to Plato’s philosophy. In English, we understand “platonic love” to mean love that is not sexual—and that’s problematic for reasons beyond the disconnect to the original idea.

Usually, when people use the term “platonic love” to describe love that isn’t sexual, a simultaneous lack of romance is implicit too. In other words, if you “platonically” love someone, you don’t want to have sex with them and you don’t want to be a couple either. This usage does absolutely nothing to acknowledge the complexities of possible relationships. It conflates romance and sex and makes couplehood or primary partnerships synonymous with a romantic-sexual relationship.
Here’s the thing:

• You can have a romantic nonsexual relationship.
• You can have a nonromantic sexual relationship.
• You can have a nonromantic nonsexual relationship.

Everybody would probably agree that the last kind—a nonromantic, nonsexual relationship—is “platonic.” But. what about the other two? If we use the word “platonic” to mean a nonsexual relationship, then the romantic nature of the relationship makes no difference, but ask any romantic asexual or cross-orientation sexual person if their nonsexual romances fit into their understanding of “platonic love,” and they’ll most likely say, “No.” Then, there’s the nonromantic sexual relationship. Is that “platonic” because it doesn’t involve romantic feelings, despite the fact it’s sexual? The problem you’re most likely to run into if you love someone you have sex with but don’t have romantic feelings for them is that no one can believe that nonromantic love and sex can coexist in the first place. To say, “I ‘platonically’ love this person I’m fucking” just sounds weird and dishonest, to most people. You can have sex with someone you don’t love at all, but if you do love that person, the impulse is to label it “romantic” love.

Of course, all three types of relationships can’t be called “platonic” if we go by the original, actual meaning of “platonic love.” But because the term has already adopted its erroneous meaning on a widespread level, we can’t really go back to the true meaning either. “Platonic” probably got hijacked to describe nonsexual love because it’s useful to have a qualifier for the word “love” in English when we have such a fucked up, poor habit of using it to exclusively mean romantic-sexual love and otherwise, tossing it around in the vaguest ways possible.

It’s nice to have a way of saying “I love this person nonsexually and nonromantically” without actually phrasing it like that, simply because what I just wrote is wordy, clunky, etc. People like it when language flows, when we can get our point across in a way that’s short and sweet, but when it comes to emotions and relationships, this “short and sweet and simple” linguistic approach only holds us back. Emotions, love, and relationships are NOT short, simple, and sweet. There’s nothing more complex in our experience. It’s utterly fucking ridiculous that we’re so reluctant to use more sophisticated language to talk about love and relationships, when our actual experiences of them are frequently complicated as hell.
The asexual community inadvertently points out that the “romantic-sexual/platonic” love dichotomy is useless, problematic, and inapplicable for a lot of people. Romantic asexuals, whether they consent to sex or not, love their romantic partners romantically but not sexually. They would not use the term “platonic love” to describe their romantic feelings, even though those feelings stand without sexual desire/attraction. Cross-orientation sexual people can say the same of their romantic attachments.

Likewise, aromantic sexual people run into the problem of labeling their relationships/feelings when they have sex without ever feeling romantic love for their sexual partners, no matter how much they care. Yet obviously, you can’t really categorize a nonromantic sexual relationship into the same box as your nonromantic nonsexual relationships. Calling them all “platonic” misses the differences between the two, both sexually and emotionally.

Then, there are the aromatic asexual and romantic sexual people who want primary nonromantic partnership, aromatics whose nonromantic love for others can be just as intense as textbook romance. And almost no one understands them and what they want or how they feel because in the world’s understanding of love and relationships, if you don’t love someone romantically, you love them “platonically,” which means that you want to be friends and not a “couple,” because only romantic-sexual pairs can be couples with a primary relationship.

Platonic love” is usually equated to friendship in our minds. If you love someone “as a friend,” meaning you don’t want them sexually or romantically, that love is “platonic.” Except—people do sometimes love their friends nonromantically . And it’s now a very common thing in 21st century English-speaking societies to conceive of the ideal romantic-sexual relationship as inclusive of friendship anyway (which is a relatively new idea in civilization and still doesn’t exist in many different countries all over the world). I also happen to think that you can love someone romantically without being friends, just as you can be sexually involved with someone who isn’t your friend. So which relationships are “platonic” and which aren’t? And if they aren’t “platonic” but they aren’t “romantic,” then what are they?

What Plato was getting at in The Symposium was essentially: the ideal love may include sex but the intellectually-based friendship in it is far more important, without which the relationship is base and carnal in a way we shouldn’t settle for. The main problem with using “platonic love” to mean friendship is that friendship itself is the most ambiguous kind of connection between two people in the first place! I say this as someone who has been studying friendship and nonsexual love for years, from literary, historical, and philosophical perspectives. Philosophy in particular makes a big deal about the ambiguity of friendship. Erotic love is relatively simple in comparison!

The “romantic-sexual/platonic” love dichotomy leaves no room for the real emotional nuances people experience in their attachments, and I think that it often causes us to live with simplified relationships not because we want to or because we have simple desires and feelings but because we have no experience, cultural context, or language to accommodate a complex social life or set of relationships. This is why language is so important. This is why words and labels matter. How can you have the kind of relationships you want with anyone, if you don’t even have the words to accurately express how you feel? Hell, half the time, people don’t even understand their own feelings and relationship desires because what they feel is not simple at all, but the only relationship framework they know makes everything seem simple and clear cut: romance and sex go together, friendship is separate from both of those things, couplehood/primary partnership is exclusive to romance and sex, etc.

But if we are to accept the possibilities and realities of asexual romance, primary nonsexual/nonromantic love, nonromantic sex and sexual friendship, romantic (nonsexual) friendship, queerplatonic nonsexual relationships and sexual relationships, etc…. we have to drop this way of thinking and speaking about relationships and love in a romantic-sexual/platonic dichotomous way. None of those “complex” relationships fit into that model, which is why the average romantic-sexual person who has no exposure to anything other than normative relationship style will almost always react to those other kinds of relationships with total confusion, rejection, etc.

Unfortunately, I don’t have an alternative to “platonic”, for describing nonsexual/nonromantic love or nonromantic love coexisting with sex or primary partners who are neither sexually nor romantically involved. Right now, I’m just going through the trouble of saying “nonsexual” and “nonromantic.” The one thing I like about using those words is their specificity. They clearly communicate what I mean, with no room for confusion other than the kind that might arise when the relationship or love in question appears “complicated” to someone else. If a relationship is romantic but nonsexual, I’ll say so. If it’s nonromantic but sexual, I’ll say so. If it’s nonromantic and nonsexual, I’ll say so. Clarity is worth a little wordiness.
#1 Platonic love

Platonic love is the simplest of all types. There are no strings attached and no sexual intentions either. It’s pure, friendly and something we experience from a very young age when we still don’t know why we have the things we have inside our underwear.
The kind of relationships you share with siblings, close childhood friends and even a few grownup friends can fall right here. Do you remember the first time you missed a friend? That was probably your first platonic love moment.

Dear Mr. Doubtful,

If you posed your first question about ‘like’ and ‘love’ to a hundred different people, you’d probably get about a hundred different responses. Why? Because there is no one answer, no right or wrong interpretation of what it means to express like and love. Sure, most people may say that love is a stronger feeling and emotion than like, but the clarity may end there. If you think about it, aren’t we lucky that we have levels to choose from when it comes to expressing the way we feel about others?
So, why would you like someone, and want to say so?

• Because s/he is fun to be around
• Because s/he is great to talk with about what’s on your mind; s/he listens and gives good advice
• Because s/he is warm, friendly, and nice to other people
• Because the two of you have a lot in common
• Because s/he respects your privacy
• Because s/he makes you feel good about yourself
• Because s/he has taken the time to get to know you and involve you in his or her life
• And an infinite number of other reasons

Now, why would you love someone, and want to say it?

• Because s/he is fun to be around
• Because s/he is great to talk with about what’s on your mind; s/he listens and gives good advice
• Because s/he is warm, friendly, and nice to other people
• Because the two of you have a lot in common
• Because s/he respects your privacy
• Because s/he makes you feel good about yourself
• Because s/he has taken the time to get to know you and involve you in his or her life
• And an infinite number of other reasons

Moving on to your question about homosexuality, notice that these lists don’t include anything about having a crush on, wanting to have sex with, or wanting to spend the rest of your life with the object of your like, or love. That’s because ‘like’ and ‘love’ don’t require these feelings. You mentioned that it’s okay to feel and voice love for your family, say a same sex sibling, no doubt for some of the reasons offered above, and not just because you’re supposed to love your brother. Is it possible your friends can fall into this same category — especially the ones who are there for you just like family?

A guy telling a guy friend “I love you” does not mean that he’s gay any more than not telling someone of the same sex that you love him means you’re heterosexual. Perhaps the most important questions to ask are, what are your true feelings? And there is the question that may be at the root of your letter: how will your friend respond? Will he smile, laugh, say the same back, hug you, get it, freak out, call you a name, stop being your friend, or learn something? You can’t control his response, but you may learn a lot about him from his reaction. If you want to tell your friend you love him and think that expressing your feelings might be uncomfortable for either of you, consider talking in distraction-free zones, in private, and when you’re both feeling relaxed.

Think of all the time we’d save, and anxiety we’d prevent, if we didn’t have to worry about the prejudice factor and how it might taint these and other incredible compliments and expressions of caring.

Like you a lot!

Researched and submitted by: Jamie Lee

…..THE CRYSTAL CONNECTION IS DEDICATED TO HONORING FALLEN OFFICERS……JAMIE LEE….


Last night I had a premonition or a inspiration to write this post in Honor of my friends who are fallen, or killed in the line of duty.  I pray it isn’t an omen for me……I and my Crystal Connection, take a moment to dedicate this post to all the Military and Law Enforcement, through out the world, who dedicated their lives, to make it a better place.  

I especially dedicate this post to all the Gay, Lesbian, Bi-sexual, Transgendered and Inter-sexed, individuals who serve in Law Enforcement or the Military, and hide who they are to protect the “Rights of  others” DEATH KNOWS NO GENDER”

In the course of my Law Enforcement Career, I have attended approximately 5 funerals of my friends, who were killed in the line of duty!    This post is a Stoic reminder that they are gone but not forgotten!

I am entitled to have “Bag Pipes” played at my funeral !   But that will be the only time I will not hear them, OR WILL I?

In dedication, I will not post anything else today, on the Crystal Connection, in remembrance of my Brother’s and Sister’s!

I AM JAMIE LEE………………………………………………………………………………..

please listen to Bag Pipes, if you have the courage………

YOU WERE A HERO! Jamie Lee

The History
of the Bagpipes in the Law Enforcement Service
The tradition of bagpipes played at fire department and police department funerals in the United States goes back over one hundred fifty years. When the Irish and Scottish immigrated to this country, they brought many of their traditions with them. One of these was the bagpipe, often played at Celtic weddings, funerals and ceilis (dances).

It wasn’t until the great potato famine and massive Irish immigration to the East Coast of the United States that the tradition of the bagpipes really took hold in the fire department. In the 1800’s, Irish immigrants faced massive discrimination. Factories and shops had signs reading “NINA” – No Irish Need Apply. The only jobs they could get were the ones no one else wanted – jobs that were dirty, dangerous, or both – firefighters and police officers. It was not an uncommon event to have several firefighters killed at a working fire. The Irish firefighters’ funerals were typical of all Irish funerals – the pipes were played. It was somehow okay for a hardened firefighter to cry at the sound of bagpipes when his dignity would not let him weep for a fallen comrade.

Those who have attended a funeral where bagpipes were played know how haunting and mournful the sound of the pipes can be. The most famous song played at fire and police funerals is Amazing Grace. It wasn’t too long before families and friends of non-Irish firefighters began asking for the bagpipes to be played for fallen heroes. The bagpipes add a special air and dignity to this solemn occasion.

Bagpipe bands represent both fire and police often have more than 60 uniformed playing members. They are also traditionally known as Emerald Societies after Ireland – the Emerald Isle. Many bands wear traditional Scottish dress while others wear the simpler Irish uniform. All members wear the kilt and tunic, whether it is a Scottish clan tartan or Irish single color kilt.

Today, the tradition is universal and not just for the Irish or Scottish. The bagpipes have become a distinguishing feature of a fallen hero’s funeral.